How to identify a karmic relationship?
If you've ever experienced a bond that feels like a magnetic connection, but with a turbulent twist, you're not alone. Karmic relationships are filled with passion and pain, often at the same time.
Although the phrase "karmic relationship" is not a clinical term, its characteristics resemble those of other well-known relationships.
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"A karmic relationship is one that is filled with all-consuming passion but is extremely difficult to maintain," explains Sanam Hafeez , PsyD, neuropsychologist and faculty member at Columbia University.
These relationships aren't meant to last, she says, but they are learning experiences for those who experience them.
If the term “karmic relationship” can have a negative connotation, Ms. Hafeez specifies that it can also be considered from the angle of personal development.
"It's an opportunity to learn something about yourself that you didn't know before, as well as the most important life lessons about love," she says.
To get a better idea of what a karmic relationship is, how it manifests, and what you can do to move away from it, read what the experts have to say.
How this type of relationship can manifest
Chances are you're in the heat of the moment before you even realize you're in a karmic relationship.
According to Andrew Aaron, LICSW, marriage counselor and sex therapist, This is a relationship in which both partners seem unable to resist, because it is characterized by a cycle of breakups and reunions.
"Both partners are very attached to this relationship and, despite the damage they have suffered, they cannot seem to be able to quit, even if everyone around them tells them to stop it," he explains.
Hafeez agrees. "There's usually an instant connection in a karmic relationship and, for some inexplicable reason, you feel magnetically drawn to the other person and feel like you can't live without them," she says.
You also feel destined to be with the other person and you don't understand why it's not working out, because this person seems perfect for you. This makes it very difficult to see your partner's flaws, says Hafeez.
Also, a karmic relationship is not exclusive to a romantic partner. You may also experience this type of bond within your family of origin, with a friend, or during a brief encounter.
Signs of a karmic relationship
It is difficult to identify a karmic relationship, especially when one is involved in one.
In addition to the characteristics described above, there are certain signs and warning signals that may indicate that you experience a karmic relationship.
Jagged emotions
One of the most common signs of a karmic relationship, Hafeez explains, is a rollercoaster of emotions. It's usually a pattern of happiness one day and misery the next.
If you're in a karmic relationship, you often feel like the slightest argument or hiccup is the end of the world, says Hafeez.
"All relationships have ups and downs, but in a karmic relationship, the difficult times are like an ever-present weight on the chest," she adds.
Sounds like a codependent relationship
Karmic relationships often resemble codependent relationships because they create an addiction that, according to Ms. Hafeez, ends up taking over all your thoughts and feelings.
You may also feel "addicted " or "dependent" on the relationship, making it very difficult for you or the other person to end it. Even though alarm bells are ringing in your head, Hafeez says you can't resist the urge to stay.
A one-sided relationship
Karmic relationships are often toxic and one-sided. Hafeez explains that this can lead to one person being selfish and the other doing whatever it takes to make them happy.
Fear of the end
Sometimes it's easier to deal with an unhealthy relationship than to deal with what may happen once it's over.
According to Hafeez, a person in a karmic relationship is often afraid of what will happen or what will become of her once the relationship ends.
Purpose of a karmic relationship
The ideology behind a karmic relationship is twofold: breaking the cycle of bad behavior from past lives and learning to heal.
"At its core, the purpose of karmic relationships is to learn and to grow," explains Hafeez.
"Some people believe that karmic relationships are agreements between two spirits to help the other grow before incarnating on Earth, for the sole purpose of learning something something we weren't able to do in a past life," she adds.
With this in mind, karmic relationships are very different from other intense relationships, like that with a soul mate .
“People often confuse karmic partners with soulmates, even though they are not the same thing,” says Hafeez.
“Karmic relationships teach you to know the world and others, while soulmates help you learn to value yourself,” she adds.
You feel good, balanced and happy in a soulmate relationship. On the other hand, in a karmic relationship, Hafeez says you will always feel like something is wrong.
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Carrie Mead, LCPC, licensed psychotherapist and certified life coach, explains that the purpose of a karmic relationship is to advance the soul in this life.
"I "I believe the most important thing to know about karmic relationships is that you (your soul) have chosen to learn this lesson to progress toward knowledge, enlightenment, and understanding," she explains.
Although the lesson you learn in your karmic relationship may be difficult, and it may cause you great pain in the short term, Mead says it develops your soul and moves you toward greater peace.
"But you must also remember that your soul provides others with karmic experiences of which you may not be aware, and sometimes you receive the lesson, and sometimes you give the lesson of the 'soul,' she said.
